identity & self-discovery

this is me.

do you know the song – this is me – from the movie the greatest showman?

music is really important to me – it’s always been a guiding force in my life. and even after listening to this song a million times, i cannot hear it without getting emotional. that moment of power in the music – of knowing who you are, of owning who you are, of saying out loud to the world – with confidence and clarity…

this is me.

why do those words spark such emotion?

when keala hits that incredible moment of raw power in the song and you get goose bumps – it’s not just because with her words and her emotion she is owning who she is (which is of course, a beautiful thing) – but in that moment she is also giving you permission to do the same  - permission to BE you. to own who YOU are.

and that’s one of the most powerful and empowering things we can do.

i am.

two of the most important words you will ever say. because what you follow those two words with determines everything! so choose wisely.

how do you complete the sentence: i am. or: this is me.

and when was the last time you did? when was the last time you explored who you are?

it’s not something we necessarily do or think about often… unless we are faced with something big in our lives that prompts us to take a path of self-discovery or re-affirming our identity.

yet, i believe, it is the first step of feeling empowered in any way, in any area of your life.

it all starts with you.

who you are.

i believe that my mission is to help people feel empowered… a recognition that they are the hero they have been waiting for… that now is the time to rise up and shine their light in the world in any way they choose.

but first, you must know what your light is! how do you switch on your light? what fuels your light? what makes your light unique? what lights you up from within?

you are here to BE you. but first you must know you. right?

it’s about self-awareness. because when you know who you are you can better live in a way that works for you… that serves you. you can have more alignment in your life… more of what lights you up in your life… things fit better. you feel like you.

but it’s also about self-determination. you get to choose who you are BEing. and you don’t have to let your experiences in the past define you… you get to decide who you are here to be, right now. you get to write your own definitions about who you are.

i like to think of the light we each shine like it comes from a chandelier, made up of many tiny bulbs or crystals, many facets… as the light hits each facet you can see all of the colours of the rainbow. in other words: you aren’t just one thing, you are complex and beautiful, just as you are, with all of your facets. and you actually get to decide – maybe it’s time to take one of those little crystals off of the chandelier; it’s not serving your light anymore, it’s no longer a fit. or maybe it’s time to hang a new one about who you choose to be, how you choose to define that.

it’s about self-exploration. because who you are – and what you want and where you are going - changes over time. sometimes – especially if you are feeling a little itchy in your life – you know that feeling? like the shirt you are wearing doesn’t quite fit any more? – it’s time to peel away the layers of your self and see what else there is to see.

it’s about self-reflection. remembering who you were born to be. remembering the road to where you are now. understanding how your life and experiences have shaped you. reflecting on what you’ve learned and what stories you want to hang on to and what you are ready to let go of now.

it’s about self-honouring. because you are a whole person made up of both light and dark and embracing all the parts of you – even the stuff that you have perhaps hidden away in the shadows or the ways you have dimmed yourself or feel diminished – it is the first step in building your self-worth.

it’s about self-confidence. seeing yourself clearly – seeing your own beautiful light clearly. (because we often don’t! we can see the light in others but not so easily see our own.) it’s time recognise and believe in your own brilliance!

it’s about self-guidance. when you know yourself and you honour yourself, you will build trust in yourself, and in turn you will better listen to your own inner voice or inner guidance system – which is what will provide that sense of purpose or direction we all long for!

it’s about self-transformation. look, the only person you can change is you. and the only person that can change you, is you. so if there is any change you wish to make in your life or your self - it starts and ends with you. you need to know you.

maybe you feel a bit lost. like you’ve lost your direction, your purpose, your drive or your focus.

it’s very hard to know where you are going or what you are doing or why if you don’t know who you are BEing, first. you need to come back to yourself in order to be able to move forwards.

this is what has prompted me on my current path of self-discovery. i have shared that i have felt lost for a long time now… i lost my parents, i lost a me that only they knew, i lost a future that i dreamed of, i lost my sense of home and a big part of my identity.

i chose my word for the year to be found. like the lyrics to the song amazing grace – i once was lost but now i’m found, was blind but now i see – i no longer wanted to stay stuck in the darkness, i wanted to see my own light again, i wanted to feel ‘found’ again.

you know, people will say: you aren’t ever lost, you are always right where you are… but i’ll tell you, it sure as hell feels like it! when we are in that stuck place we use words like lost. stuck. seek. find. remember. uncover. discover. explore. it makes me think: you know what we need? a map! a map back to ourselves. so i created a map for myself and i want to share it with you - it’s a guidebook called shine - and along with that i wanted to record a new series for the podcast, talking to people about how they have done the work to know themselves, embrace their identity, and celebrate who they are.

perhaps you feel pretty confident in your self-awareness and self-direction. that’s so awesome. one thing that i have learned is that the job is never done. you are not a static thing. and if you are stepping up in your life in any way – maybe you have some new goals, maybe you are trying some new things, maybe you are just feeling so ready for the next steps in your life – then it’s the perfect time to explore yourself a little deeper than you ever have before.

big dreams require clarity, alignment, drive, faith, and more. all things that come with self-awareness.

it all goes back to you.

back when i started the lighthouse revolution i chose the word ‘revolution’ in part because it brings to mind a full circle. the word itself is a coming back to your self… coming back to who you are, who you were born to be… coming back to the light you are here to shine.

then you can rise up and step forwards into whatever life you want for yourself – a life free from whatever was holding you back or keeping you stuck. that’s the other part of the revolution… the uprising.

first go back to your light. then rise up from that place.

then make like a lighthouse… and shine.

so how do you do it? how do you remember yourself or find yourself or discover new layers of your self? definitely check out the shine guide book. and you can also try these ideas: online quizzes, asking your loved ones, messages from your soul. look for the AHAs!

way back when i first started blogging i remember a conversation i had with a friend’s dad – someone i really respect and look up to. he was asking me about my blog and i stumbled over my words as i tried to explain, somewhat sheepishly, that i thought i might share some of the stuff i was learning, stuff that was helping me. he interrupted my fumbling rambling and said: of course you are. you are a teacher.

in that moment it was like something clicked back into place.

you see, i had started out my career as a high school teacher… then i moved away from canada to australia and stopped teaching to have a family. i had started my own business and was feeling a bit lost… trying to find a new sense of identity (apart from being a stay-at-home mum.) that moment of chatting with my friend – who is also a teacher by the way – it was an AHA for me… remembering who i was. permission to be who i was. and creating a new definition for who i was… building a new sense of identity for myself. still a teacher. but in a new way.

and now i am on the path of self-discovery once again. as i said earlier – i once was lost but now i am using my map and i am finding my way again. i am starting with my identity and finding me. what comes next? we’ll see! and i will share it with you… i promise. because i want you to remember – you are the hero you have been waiting for. you have the power within you to have the life you want. let’s make it happen – together.

please join me for this podcast series: this is me… and do check out the new guidebook: shine.