unstucking strategies

last year i published a book - RISE - which is full of simple, doable strategies to get unstuck, to make little shifts or changes in your life so that you can help yourself out of whatever sort of stuckness you are in. that book was years in the making… i took big breaks from working on it because i too got stuck! even since publishing it, i still get stuck. life can be like a roller coaster, can’t it… periods of rising, periods of sinking… periods of shining bright, periods of feeling dull and dim.

recently, through our Australian winter, i found myself once again sinking into grief and depression. after a few months, i knew – thanks to the years of work i had been doing to learn to help myself rise and rise and rise again – that i had to do something. i had a thought: maybe i need to go on medication? then i had another thought: what if i actually tried - actively, purposefully, a true effort – to help myself in the way that i expected a doctor and meds to help me? i had a thought: what if i truly worked to help myself for the next 30 days and if i still feel like i am sinking then i will look at what else can help: medication, help from a professional.

i wondered: what would help me, what could i give myself each day as a sort of medicine?

the answer i came up with was 3 things: walking, water, and the work. by the work i meant not just sitting in front of Netflix or hiding in bed with a book – numbing – but doing some thing good for me… for my brain or my spirit or my inner self.

almost immediately a challenge came into my newsfeed: a 31 day walking pledge for mental health. it seemed like a no brainer – like an actual shove from the universe – so i signed up. i already knew that walking is a baby step for me towards rising, so it was an obvious choice. and it absolutely helped, i’m keeping going with it way past those 31 days because i want to keep feeling better and movement is medicine for me. but i also acknowledge that i have the privilege of time and space – in my day, in my life, to do things for myself – and safety and good weather and places to walk that fill up my soul, like the beach.

but i want to share that story because even though walking is not for everyone – and it certainly is not a cure for anything – i do think the pledge of actively doing something for YOU is a powerful one. i wrote a whole book with 55 strategies to get unstuck, and i still get stuck. i needed to actually choose a thing, and DO the thing… unstucking doesn’t happen magically. i have to remind myself, stop holding out for a hero to come along and save the day. the hero is me.

what are some things we can do? here are some ideas – some things i have been trying.

like my walking challenge, choose a thing and do it for 30 days. just see what happens, how it feels.

another idea… sign up for a course or class or program. something that you have to show up for, something you actually want to try. in my moments of deciding i had to do something to help myself, another great thing showed up in my feed: a free course called the science of well being which is offered online, yes free, by yale. taught by laurie santos. this was another nudge from the universe, clearly, so i signed up and it really helped as a baby step toward that work i was talking about. another great one: brene brown did a summer series on her book the gifts of imperfection, on her podcast unlocking us. it was a great, free, way to work through each of the topics of what helps us to be happier, to be more whole hearted. we live in an age of so many learning opportunities – so many of them free or low cost – what have you always wanted to learn? or what is a topic that could inspire you, ignite you, get your brain or creative juices or body going?

lastly… make the appointment. in the depths of my depression, when i thought something has to give, i made an appointment to get my blood taken and things checked. it turned out my iron was rock bottom – the dr looked at me shocked and said “i don’t know how you get out of bed? me: ummm i don’t? lol. so i had an iron infusion, and it was not a magic cure, but it was a baby step. it was one tiny thing i could do to take a step to help myself. doctor, dentist, counsellor, nutritionist, energy healer, art therapist… is there any little thing that you could book in for that is a step to taking care of you? hell – get a mole checked, get a wart removed, get your eyes checked… do it as an act of being your own goddamn hero.

these are 3 general things that have helped me these past months – a challenge, a course, an appointment. they led to lots of little things too, some specific helpful things that have made a big difference in getting unstuck – again, still. so in the coming episodes of the lightouse revolution podcast i plan to share those ‘get unstuck’ strategies: we’ll explore strategies from the book RISE, some of the new strategies i’ve been playing with recently, and some strategies from readers and listeners too!

i’d love for you to join in the conversation – if there is something working for you, even the tiniest of things, please do share. let’s help each other get unstuck. we might not stay unstuck, and that’s ok – all part of the roller coaster of life. but at least we have things we can do, when we are ready, to help ourselves out of the stuck place.

this new series on the podcast is called is get unstuck, find it here - and you can find RISE here.