thoughts on permission

last week i wrote

“a big part of building a tower with integrity and alignment is permission.”

permission is actually a big part of everything you are here to do: igniting your light, beaming your message out in a way that feels authentic, building your tower and your foundation, and taking the steps you need to take to get unstuck.

permission is a huge key to all of it. and it is something that comes up again and again as i work with and talk with women in biz.

here are some random thoughts on permission. i hope one of them clicks for you today!

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who else is going to give you permission? there is no boss, no manager, no leader, or teacher to figure this out and tell you what to do. this is your job now. you are the boss, the captain of this ship. you need to be in charge. you need to tell you what to do. you have permission to decide.

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often we don’t give ourselves permission because we don’t actually trust ourselves. start there. start with what you know for sure and build on that. build belief in what you are doing. you have permission to trust yourself.

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what would happen if you did? what would happen if you didn’t? what are the benefits? the consequences? will anyone even care? and if they did, so what? are your worries about this thing real, or are they in your head? you have permission to get real.

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instead of asking who am i to ______ (do this thing i dream of doing)… start asking who am i NOT to? if you DON’T do it, what are you saying? that you don’t care about those people that you long to serve? you have permission to feel worthy.

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when people tell you that they love what you do, that they support you, that they want you succeed, that they value you, that they are looking to you for the next step… believe them! people don’t just make that shit up. they don’t lie about what they love. you have permission to believe them.

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you are not a volunteer. this is a business. it is your job to build something that allows you to earn money doing the work that you are here to do.  even if it is easy, natural, authentic, fun, or stuff that you would do anyways! you serve, you deserve. you have permission to earn.

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we have all these rules in our heads about what we need to do and how to do it, sometimes based on what we see others doing, or what we’ve been told to do, or the stories we are telling ourselves. but who says? who wrote that rule? you have permission to ask WTFS?

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we often wait for everything to be ready, to be right, to be perfect, to be figured out, to have our ducks all in a row, a 5 year plan, or a 10 point checklist. but you are allowed to just fucking do it. it’s ok to take action before you are ready. you have permission to JFDI.

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somebody might not like it. someone might be upset. you might hear that you are wrong or crazy or making a mistake. that’s ok though, there will always be people who feel the need to spread negativity (and it's always more about them than it is about you!). you have permission to ignore the haters.

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often when we allow ourselves to consider something our heads get way ahead of us, our brains start going crazy. it feels impossible and overwhelming fast! start with the tiniest step. keep it as simple as possible. make it incremental. you have permission to start small.

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we feel obligated to say yes. we feel bad if we say no. we feel guilty. we feel like we are missing out. we feel like it might make us look like a bitch. or look selfish. or greedy. but we can only stretch so far, and a NO is a yes to something else. you have permission to create boundaries.

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it is in doing that we get clarity. it is in talking that we find the right words. we learn as we go, and as we know more we can do better. but we don’t learn anything or get any clarity if we stay in our heads and never try. you have permission to just try.

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we are so close to what we do, it’s so personal. and there is only us... only one perspective. sometimes fresh eyes and a fresh perspective can make a huge difference. that’s why coaches and mentors and mastermind partners and other lighthouse keepers are so important. you have permission to seek support.

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sometimes all the support and all the learning and all of the seeking just confuses things even more. you have a sense of knowing already built in, you just need to learn to listen to and trust that inner voice, that intuition or knowing. you have permission to follow your inner compass.

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you are the most unique part of your business... no one can copy you. when you are different you can make a difference... weird is good! your biz has to be in alignment with you... your biz, your way. you have permission to be YOU.

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can you add to this list? pop your ideas below! how else can we give ourselves permission today?

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karen gunton1 Comment