celebrate good times, come on!

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(did i get that song stuck in your head?)

celebration is a powerful, powerful mindset tool – one that is often overlooked. we will do celebration at certain times because it feels appropriate, even fun, but we don’t do it to the extent that we could... we don't do it with enough intention, with enough purpose.

this is the magic of celebration:

when we celebrate our success we train our brains to believe we are worthy and deserving of success.

when we celebrate our strengths, our gifts, our talents, our service we train our brains to believe that what we offer the world has value.

when we celebrate who we are, as we are, we train our brains to believe that who we are is actually perfectly enough.

and so we must celebrate... on purpose, with intention.

celebrate the evidence that you have amassed over the years of all of the ways that you shine. celebrate those moments of courage, those periods of action taking, those times that you felt guided or on purpose… celebrate the reminders of your inner strength, of your creativity, of your dreams coming true!

the truth is that we carry around with us a massive load of evidence of all of our short comings – we carry around the proof of our failures, the moments of rejection, the reminders of everything we can’t do and didn’t do and aren’t doing well – these things stick with us.

but we rarely carry around the evidence of our success – yah, we might celebrate for a moment but then we move on from that and pick up all that heavy ‘baggage’ once again, full of all of the proof our ‘not enoughness’.

we ought to give at least equal space to carrying around the evidence of our brilliance… if not more!

here's why: each moment you celebrate creates a snapshot for your lifetime “album” of achievement. it’s the whole album that becomes important (not just one picture of failure or rejection or not good enough).

celebrate your wins, your successes, your achievements and accomplishments. even the very smallest of wins, even the little steps you take along the way. notice more of these moments… and celebrate them!

if you do celebrate - this is a nudge to amplify your efforts wherever you are at. if you’ve been celebrating big moments, add in more small ones. if you’ve been celebrating by quietly patting yourself on the bag, start sharing them out loud (remember your zones of comfort and expand outwards!) – there is more power and a greater shift in you when you share your celebration publicly, you own it by sharing it!

celebrate your strengths, your talents, your gifts, your zone of genius… celebrate the difference you make and the way that you help people and the way that you are uniquely you. own it by sharing it... say out loud – did you know that one of my special talents is xyz? or say – this is the feedback i received today, i am really honoured to help in this way.

when people tell you they love what you do, believe them!  just think, when you tell someone that you love what you do, you mean it right? so don’t brush it off as luck, as them being nice, or as no big deal. your light matters, so own that. practice NOT brushing off compliments, thanks, or kudos. say out loud: thank you. i am glad to help with that, or i am glad to know that.

celebrate yourself with more self-love. you don’t have to wait for someone to tell you that you matter – you can speak those words to yourself. you can love yourself with what you say to yourself, with your acts of self-love, even with your awareness… look in the mirror and see all of the ways you are beautiful and strong and unique (rather than the short-comings). practice loving yourself up instead of beating yourself up.

if we want others to think we are worthy, valuable, deserving, enough… we must first think these things of ourselves. we need to engage in radical self-love, we need to celebrate the abundance of not just what we have, and what we do, but of who we are… because abundance is enoughness.

it’s time to believe in your own brilliance. the more you celebrate you the more you build that belief in yourself.


join us for 12 days of reflection where we will indeed spend one of those days celebrating, but in a way that you probably haven't before! i am going to stretch you here with a fun and eye opening activity! 

finish strong

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we have 2 months left of 2017.

how do you want to finish the year? what do you want to focus on through the end of this year? what will set you up now for your intentions for 2018?

i have been asking myself these questions today.

there is a little voice in my head that pipes up every year around this time… a voice that whispers “dude. just chill. it’s pretty well the end of the year. you should just coast… no need to start anything new, no need to keep working, no need to keep trying. i mean, why bother? just give up now. start fresh in january. next year will be your year to rock.”

that voice talks a bunch of shit.

we still have time. and there is no better time than NOW to start… or to finish what you’ve started.

november has some cool energy behind it. we are in a ‘1 year’ which is all about beginnings. and we are in an 11 month – which amplifies the 1 energy.

i think this - today, or this week even - is such a great opportunity to have a think about what you really want to focus on for the rest of this year… and show the universe you mean business!

try this:

reflect – think back to the start of the year, perhaps pull out your notebooks or planners. look at the goals, plans, and intentions you set for yourself.

focus – is there anything from your plans that you could still begin now? is there something that you started this year that you could now finish? is there something you still want to do this year – especially with this energy of new beginnings?

consider – it could be a physical project, it could be a mindset thing you want to work on, it could be a new habit or daily practice, it could be one of your goals or plans or ‘to dos’

decide – how will you make time to work on this thing? schedule it into your daily plans? do a 30 day challenge for yourself this month? set aside some time in the coming weeks?

declare – share out loud with someone your plans to finish this year STRONG and anchor into what you are stating to the universe by doing so – are you saying “see, i told you this matters!” or “watch me, i am so ready for the next step!” or perhaps “i am ready to finish this year the way i want to begin the next…”

and that in itself is pretty powerful isn’t it?

how will you finish 2017 strong?


would you like to join a FREE “finish strong" challenge?

over the final weeks of the year i will be sharing 17 micro-strategies to finish 2017. what is a micro-strategy? well it is something that will take only 2 minutes to learn and 5 minutes to try! quick, easy, doable... yet powerful! we will cover a range of strategies – physical, emotional, energetic, and mindset – all with an aim to close out 2017 in a powerful way and to set ourselves up for an amazing 2018. don’t give up now and say “maybe next year” – instead finish this year strong and clear the slates so that next year can indeed be everything you want it to be. click here to join us… it’s free. and we start on december 1.

forgiveness

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a big part of the self-leadership journey is learning not just WHAT is going on for us but WHAT the heck to do about it.

right?

it goes like this:

wow. i’ve realized that i have this fear / worry / doubt / frustration / story / memory / trigger / limiting belief / resistance / block / pattern / issue / insert whatever you’ve realized here

wow. i’ve really got to let that go / change that / heal that / stop that / clear that / get past that

great! but how?

there is one “how” that i truly believe helps with anything and everything.

that "how" is forgiveness.

many times when we hear that word – forgive – we can get a little defensive.

why should i forgive that person or that situation? they don’t deserve it!

this is the most important thing to realize about forgiveness: we don’t forgive for the other person’s benefit, we do it for ourselves. WE deserve it.

forgiveness is a way to let go of the weight we carry around with us. a way to change the energy around something that is blocking us. and a way to clear the fog that prevents our light from shining through.

another thing can happen when we hear the word forgiveness. we think how do i forgive a fear? how do i forgive an old story, an old pattern, a limiting belief? isn’t forgiveness for PEOPLE?

here is my take on it: when i do forgiveness i do it for me, and i do it to me.

if it is a fear, a limiting belief, a layer of resistance… i picture forgiving my inner self, my soul, the lighthouse me that lives inside. i ask her to forgive me for letting that thing block me or for hanging on to it for so long or maybe for not being aware of it.

my favourite forgiveness practice is ho’oponopono (you can learn more about this practice in this video or this article if you’d like.)

ho’oponopono goes very simply like this:

i love you

i am sorry

please forgive me

thank you

when i do this practice i simply say the words to my inner self until i feel the energy of whatever it is i am stuck with begin to change. but you can create your own practice or ritual out of this if you’d like!

try…

  • visualizing your inner self/younger self/future self/higher self and saying the words to her
  • visualizing a beam of light and love being sent out to heal/clear/dissolve whatever you are forgiving
  • writing out everything associated with whatever you are forgiving and then reciting the mantra - burning or crossing out or releasing in some way whatever you have written
  • using the mantra with tapping/EFT or while doing reiki or some other practice you love
  • using the mantra while meditating, saying each phrase with each breath
  • using the mantra while running it out, or walking it out, or moving your body in some way to shift things
  • using the mantra while in the shower or the ocean… picture the flowing water washing away the pain of the issue and leaving nothing but learning/awareness/understanding behind
  • singing the mantra
  • visualizing the mantra healing whatever part of your body you are holding this resistance/stress/trauma in
  • writing a letter to a person associated with whatever you need to forgive… let it all out! and then forgive. and remember the forgiveness is for you, not them… burn the letter instead of sending it if you wish.
  • use the mantra to make a list: everything you love about yourself, what you are sorry for and what you need to forgive yourself for now, and then everything you are grateful for. self-love and gratitude are powerful practices on their own, why not combine them with forgiveness for an even more powerful practice

my point is that the practice itself will have more power if it feels powerful to you… the words will have the intention that you give them! so make this your own, make it something that is truly a “how” – a tool in your toolbelt to use when you need it.

perhaps this is a practice you have already been using. perhaps this is a nudge to take it to the next level in someway – to create that personal practice or ritual that feels even more powerful!

perhaps these 4 simple phrases seem too simple to be powerful. i get that, i thought that at first too. but honestly, i have seen situations change before my eyes when using this mantra, in ways that can’t really be explained except that the energy of the situation truly shifts when we use ho’oponopono…

…when we use it from the heart and to the soul.


click here for a free class teaching my signature illuminate process for doing inner work. when the illuminate process shines a light on something you need to clear, you can try forgiveness!

illumination. exploration. intuition.

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this month i launched the new lighthouse oracle deck over on kickstarter. the deck is called ‘illuminate’ because the whole idea for this deck is to use it as a tool to explore the lighthouse that you are building, that you are BEing… to shine a light of awareness on anything going on within ourselves.

as little as 3 years ago i never would have guessed i would be creating an oracle deck. my background is teaching science! lol. and then teaching branding and marketing strategy. oh and then teaching mindset strategy. which is all about ‘inner work’. hmmmm… you can see how the journey unfolds.

i like to think of my own journey as a spiral, of both growing and learning and evolving, but also of ‘unlearning’ and coming back to myself. when i was young i was into exploring all sorts of spiritual-type stuff, though i never had a name for it. i was definitely intuitive – like most people i can point to times in my life when my intuition was strong – but again i didn’t really have a clear recognition of it. i started journaling, as an act of self-awareness & exploration, when i was just 14 and also started collecting ‘messages’ in the form of quotes and song lyrics.

but then somewhere along the way i left my interest in all that ‘stuff’ behind. i guess i got focused on my career and my relationship and my children… and lost my focus on me. my journey into building a little biz brought me back around to exploring my purpose and asking ‘who was i born to be? what am i here to do?’

what i have noticed is that the more i have ‘worked on’ the various parts of myself and my life the more i realized there was one area that i was missing… that soulful, spiritual side. as i was writing the lighthouse revolution book i realized there were some ideas and strategies that were inspiring to me that didn’t fit into the framework i was working with, that’s when i had an AHA that there was one more component to add to the lighthouse – that connection to source, that connection to soul, spirit, universe, god… whatever you like to call it!

for me, spiritual practice is simply part of the ‘inner work’ i do… it’s one act of self-leadership that i combine with many other acts: self-awareness, self-expression, self-love, self-worth, self-exploration, self-support, and more. it’s one piece of the puzzle! i am enjoying playing in the space of strengthening my intuition, exploring my ‘stuff’, healing & clearing, learning & growing… because i am here to be my highest, brightest self and so i will do whatever happens to help with that!

the lighthouse has become a framework for self-leadership, and the oracle is simply one tool to help us BE the lighthouse… whether we use it as a tool to explore or stuff, or to tune into our own intuition, or to identify how we can better shine our light.

but there are many, many ways to do the work of intuition, exploration, and illumination… to build a spiritual practice or to practice healing… just as there are many ways to define these words as well. we need to do it our way!

to share more examples of how these themes factor in to one person’s journey in a variety of ways i have asked some of my friends to share their own stories and journeys. i hope this helps to ‘shine a light’ on the simple truth that these things do make a difference, and that you get to define them and practice them in any way you choose.


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tash corbin ~ business coach for heart-centred, soul-driven entrepreneurs

I was resistant to intuition in my early days in business. I used to consistently say “I’m not an intuitive person”… but then as I continued to grow my business, I noticed that I had always used terms like “My gut feel is…” or “What I’m feeling we should do is…”

At first, I tried to train myself AWAY from saying these things, because I felt that as a business strategist, people weren’t paying me for my gut feel, they were paying me for my knowledge and expertise, based on what I had learned with my brain.

I think it takes a lot of courage to acknowledge that we aren’t 100% in charge of what we think and feel, and I continually work on opening up my intuition more and more, and owning it when I’m not sure where my advice is coming from. I am very open that my webinars, training sessions, and live calls are fluid, and that I just let it flow from me. Sure, I’m teaching from a space of having been immersed in the world of business strategy for over 15 years now - but more and more I am trusting that my intuition is guiding me along the way.


I have worked on my ‘mindset’ from before day one of my business. When I refer to my mindset I include things like energy, looking after my body, intuition, and more - basically the non-strategy side of business, both planning and implementation.

I recently found an old journal from when I first started my own business - that first journal had about 50% of the pages filled with exploring and clearing my ‘stuff’… It reminded me just how important both strategy and mindset were to the initial success of my business, and how important it is to address both even now.

I don’t believe it’s actually possible to create and build a business without looking at your own ‘stuff’ … it will surface eventually even if you’re not proactive about it - but the more you are on the front foot, actively exploring, uncovering and clearing - the faster you and your business grow.

My favourite tools are daily income tracking, kinesiology, emotional freedom technique, journaling and afformations. I work with a kinesiologist around once every 2-3 weeks, and a tapping practitioner around launch times and when I’m focused on a particularly big up-level. I track my income and do tapping, journaling and afformations daily.

I also think there are other things that I do which might not be considered ‘spiritual’, but that I think play a big role. Things like moving my body every day, going to bed by 9pm whenever I can, eating great quality food - these really contribute to my effectiveness, intuition and mindset in a huge way.

(find tash here. and scroll down to find out how to win a copy of her book!)


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natalie sisson ~ entrepreneur, business strategist, and freedomist

have always relied on and been in tune with my gut. Especially throughout my travels and personal journey… but since starting my business, I've looked to it more and more. My spiritual practice is relatively new and for me comes in the form of meditation, mindfulness and introspection. I recently signed up to receive Elizabeth Peru's Global Energy Report - and that's about as 'out there' as I've allowed myself to go so far. There's so much I've not tapped into or learned in this arena and I'm open to going on that journey now.

did a lot of ‘inner work’ and self-exploration in my late teens and early 20s when I was very much into personal self-help books… Tony Robbins 'Awaken the Giant Within' and Napoleon Hill's 'Think and Grow Rich' were a big part of this. What I learned and applied back then has stayed with me through until now, but after my 3 month business sabbatical this year and 180 degree life change I have very much gone on a new personal journey of learning, opening up, exploration, and the Universal Cycles of Life work. I am about to embark on another round of this in the coming months.

do love essential oils for energy or peace and calm, I use them through a diffuser. I also love incense when I'm doing yoga or meditation, to be fair all the time. I've worked with a crystal through my friend before but don't have one myself. That's the next level for me.

(find natalie here, and join her right2freedom movement!)


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jo bendle ~ productivity coach and founder of the wildly successful society

Interestingly, I don’t consider myself intuitive and my initial reaction to thinking about my spiritual practice, is that I don’t have one! But I can now see that I do have tools and an inner ‘something’ that guides me in making decisions, I just hadn’t connected it to ‘intuition’.  I’m pretty practical when it comes to this work – I don’t own any crystals, I have one oracle card deck (soon to be two J), and I am getting better at listening to my intuition as my journey evolves.

As far as I’m concerned the inner work of exploring & clearing our resistance is the biggest deal there is – it doesn’t matter how many tools we have, how many goals we set etc if we don’t work on clearing what’s really stopping us from having what we want.  I have been clearing limiting beliefs for a long time, and still have more to work through.  I know we will always be clearing stuff – the good news it’s now a fun part of my growth plan.  I’m more ‘curious’ about the stuff that shows up now – but only because I have worked with people like Karen to allow me to explore this.

I’ve definitely become more aware of the importance of the inner work as my journey evolves.  I used to believe everything my mind told me and it wasn’t all good!  Luckily now I know it’s not true and I have a choice whether to listen or get a new more empowering story to tell myself!  I’m still work in progress but it’s become less of a negative and more ‘just part of the journey’.

For me, the best tool for doing inner work has been connecting with likeminded women, my mastermind sisters, or a coach.  The people who get me and can pull me out of my ‘stories’.  I can’t always see it myself – I find having support in this area is the game changer for me – this journey was NOT meant to be driven alone!  Depending on what’s coming up my main go to tools are EFT, journaling and SOS calls with my business besties!

(find jo here, and watch for her new mission to #LIVEBIG)


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Prerna Malick ~ copywriter and content creator for website, blog, & social media

I do regular journaling and prayer as well as tapping or EFT... while prayer has always been a part of my life, EFT is fairly recent but I really enjoy it. Also I’ve found using essential oils help me to feel clearer and more in touch with my intuition... Journaling is a new part of my routine and I’m using it to heal past memories, forgive and also introspect.

(find prerna here, and check out her amazing content bistro!)


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michelle house ~ financial educator & money mentor

I use my spiritual practice to tap into my intuition and seek clarity; without it I get foggy, I do things from a place stuck in my head rather than from my soul. my spiritual practice opens up more doorways than I could have imagined to continue giving me clarity of purpose… which is how I define success.

I keep learning new ways to do things, to recover more quickly if I do go on a downward spiral (of failure or frustration)… my recovery time is better now, thanks to my spiritual practice… it keeps me moving forwards, moving quickly.

I guess I have been in the spiritual space for 20 years, though I didn’t call it that, and it wasn’t something I always trusted. I didn’t want to be seen as ‘woo woo’ and I wasn’t brave enough, fierce enough to step into that space and own it. It’s come later as I’ve gotten older, as I’ve been able to look back to the times I thought I had it all figured out, yet it unfolded in a way that I couldn’t have planned. that gift of hindsight, that toolkit of evidence where I can see how the universe has had my back, has helped me build trust.

I am noticing now that I don’t let fear rule my life anymore. I notice other people’s fears coming at me, and the old michelle would think ‘you should be afraid too’ but now I am able to recognize the fear and move forwards anyhow.

I also don’t carry my ‘baggage’ – my stuff – around with me. I unpack it, I tidy it up. everyday if I need too. I love working in the cycle of the moon so I definitely do clearing every month. I love to set an intention with the new moon and look at the limiting beliefs around that intention, then do the work to clear those limiting beliefs… this soul cleansing makes my intentions even more powerful!

The tools I use for clearing include energy work, writing, talking with others, plus a variety of other things as I need them… my spiritual practice guides me to which tools to use. one of my favourites is to write a ‘fuck you letter’ – express it all down on paper, because finding it is the key. then you can work on forgiveness or letting go, that’s where the freedom is! we need to do this clearing work so that our path of service is not interfered with by this stuff we carry around!

I also love just breathing. 3 big, beautiful, life force breaths to bring you to the present moment and to tune into your intuition. the more I work my practice the more I’ve learnt that I don’t need tools as much anymore… I am the tool. my job is tuning in and clearing and tuning in and clearing, on repeat.

(find michelle here, and join her RICH living room!)


has intuition been part of your journey? how about exploring & clearing your stuff? what tools do you use to tap into your intuition, to explore & clear, or as part of your own spiritual practice?

i am giving away a copy of tash corbin's NEW book - #nomorepinkghetto : the feminine evolution of online business. use the hashtag #illuminate in your comments to have your name added to the draw to win the book!

feeling stuck?

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confession time: through most of may-aug i had really lost my mojo. i was feeling like i had lost my direction and lost my clarity and lost my impact. i was hoping that some space and time and distance (including some time to just hide in my bed for a while!) would give me some clarity but that didn't work.

this is what worked. i decided that even though i had no clarity/direction/impact that i could just show up and help someone. and so that became my goal. my mantra.

just show up and help someone today.

and i did it every day. even though i wanted to keep hiding in my bed. and then one day i realized my mojo was coming back. and then one day i remembered my impact. and then one day i realized i had some purpose again.

i say i want to help people shine. so i needed to show up and help people.

finally having some mojo back i’ve been getting the lighthouse oracle deck ready to launch… this has been my ‘shooting start project’ – that little dream inside of me that was just waiting to be brought to life. and i’ve been excited about it!

and then last week, on the day i ws ready to kickoff the kickstarter, 58 people were tragically, horrifically killed in a mass shooting in las vegas.

i wanted to hide in my bed again.

on a day like that, we can often feel so fucking helpless. it's all too big to fix, it's all so hard, where do we even begin?

and the work we do do might seem insignificant, frivolous even. i am meant to be talking about my new oracle deck. you might be talking about make-up or skin care or artwork or websites or money blocks or biz strategy.

but i am reminded of this quote from mr rogers...

"When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, 'Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping. To this day, especially in times of disaster, I remember my mother’s words, and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers — so many caring people in this world." — Fred Rogers

just show up and help someone today.

don't think about how insignificant your thing feels... remember how important it is to help someone with your thing. focus on how you help people.

the world needs changing.

and that feels massive sometimes. and maybe our work doesn't feel all that world changing. maybe you just want to change the world for one other person. maybe you just want to change YOUR world.

and that is the perfect starting point actually.

to change the world we must first change ourselves. the work starts within. 

anything you can do to begin to change your world is very important work. it's one of the reasons i have been so excited to bring the lighthouse oracle deck to life. yes it's inspiring. yes it's pretty. yes it reminds you to shine. 

but more than that is helps you to do your inner work. the illuminate process that i teach with the deck really is such a powerful and empowering process - to explore your resistance, to 'spiral with your stuff' as i like to say, and look at what you need to ignite, align, strengthen, heal, clear, or shift withing yourself. 

it starts with us. and we all need tools to do the work.

so anything that you offer to someone that helps them be the person they are here to be, that helps them to shine brighter in the world, that helps them heal or shift or grow or evolve or get ignited, that helps them to rise up and speak out and teach and share and help someone else...

well that matters. 

last week i gave myself permission to be sad and angry, to feel lost and uncertain, to hide in my bed for a little while. but then i also gave myself permission to shine my light... to talk about the ways i want to help other people shine... because the light is all we have to illuminate the darkness.

if you are feeling lost, frustrated, confused, uncertain, scared, helpless, questioning, no mojo…

try it.

just show up and help someone today.

just try it every day… try it for 10 days, for 30 days. see what happens.

the universe's library

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here’s how i see it…

the universe has a BIG library. 

can you picture that big library in your mind’s eye?

rows and rows and shelves and shelves full of stories, ideas, messages, reminders, strategies, processes, lessons, inspiration, and more.

and you are here to contribute your voice, your message, your ideas… your BOOK… to those shelves.

please, please do not look at all of the books already on all of those shelves and think:

who am i to…

i am just a…

i am too…

i am not ___ enough…

i couldn’t possibly…

other people are already sharing this…

i don’t know what to say…

no one cares…

why bother…

i have no time…

what i want you to do instead is focus on the GAP.

the empty space on that shelf. the book missing from that shelf.

that is your voice that is missing. your vibe, your idea, your perspective, your story.

you are here… not to be the expert, not to be the guru… but simply to be a contributor.

you are here to add your voice to a conversation.

you are here to add something to the world that wasn’t here before.

you are here to add your book to the universe’s library.

the gap is there, waiting for you.


WRITE your LIGHT starts next week! early bird prices on until tomorrow.

the one truth

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when i spoke at the heart-centred biz conference #ladyposse2017 i had the opportunity to be on a panel, up on stage, answering questions from the audience. 

one powerful question we were asked: what is the one truth that you have learned along the way, that you can share with us now.

at the time i rambled on a bit about how our biz journey is a reflection of our soul journey so we have to be willing to do the work on ourselves as much as we work on our biz. it was an ok answer.

but i hopped off stage and the conference day ended and i went off to my suite and sat on my patio and poured myself a glass of wine and thought...

fuck.

i wish i said something else.

i wish i said this instead...

it's not a long answer... it's short and simple and it's one you've heard before. but i think it needs to be said again... and again and again. until that truth becomes the first thing we say... not the one that comes to us much later.

so i'm sharing it here with the hope that someone out there needs this reminder.

with love...

you are a warrior goddess

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my 5 big takeaways from the incredible denise duffield-thomas at the #ladyposse2017 heart-centred biz conference - some ideas to help us as we SHINE our LIGHT in the world!

watch the video for ideas to help you...

  • stop playing small
  • use the phrase "all roads lead to..." to get clarity in your own work
  • use powerful mantras to hammer your message home
  • write your light and get your message out with a book
  • talk to your inner self and remind her that "she is a fucking warrior goddess"

(warning - i get blubbery and emotional in this video... but that's also kinda the point! it's all about being moved by a message, and how we can do that too for our work.)

watch the video on youtube or facebook

soul lag

soul lag? have you experienced it?

i just returned back home to australia after being home in canada for the past 6 weeks.

(yes, i did write ‘home’ twice. i always say my heart lives in two places – canada and australia are both my home – yet the truth is that i don’t feel 100% percent settled in either place!)

since travelling there and back, i’ve been feeling so out of sorts – kind of disconnected, kind of lost, kinda “blue”… even feeling physically unwell just to go along with feeling low energetically, emotionally, and mentally.

a gorgeous friend said to me: it sounds to me like you have soul lag.

i knew she hit the nail on the head because those words made me cry. i wasn’t too sure what she meant exactly, i just knew that the words felt like me.

soul lag.

i asked around about what those words mean and people shared some amazing ideas.

  • when travel but you leave a bit of yourself behind
  • we leave soul fragments in places we experience big emotional events
  • when we travel from a place that feels good it take time for our soul to catch up
  • our physical body lands but it takes more time for the soul, the mind, and the emotions to catch up
  • when we experience huge growth/expansion there is a lag for the rest of you to catch up, to fit that ‘bigness’ into the rest of life
  • when your soul experiences bigness but it doesn’t quite fit yet into your life, or you ‘smallify’ it in some way to fit your life, or to feel more safe
  • growth is happening at a soul level… there is something new on your way, a next level for your soul
  • having to adjust to a new version of yourself in a new place, disconnected from the sense of self we develop in a new place
  • making sense of what we’ve just experienced and wondering who we are now

i love these ideas and i think they can be true not just for being in a new place physically (like with travel) but in a new place emotionally, mentally, or energetically as well… growth and change and ‘travel’ can occur in lots of areas of life, creating a soul lag that needs to be honoured.

so how do we do that? how do we adjust to a new ‘place’?

i’ve used the lighthouse framework to brain storm some ideas. perhaps they will help you the next time you notice you are experiencing some soul lag!

the harbour: which is about being grounded and giving yourself some space

try: walking barefoot in the grass or sand; epsom salt baths & grounding essential oils; mindfulness exercises so you can ‘be where your feet are’; reciting a mantra of “it is safe to be here in this place”

the spiral staircase: which is about honouring your journey, honouring how you feel

try: let yourself feel sad, lost, blue, lonely, out of sorts… cry if you need to!; explore your feelings by journaling; raise your vibe by focusing on gratitude, love, joy, compassion etc.

the foundation: which is about your mindset

try: tapping into a positive mindset such as: what you learn now, you can teach later; tell yourself you’ve got this; try acting as if; do something to help someone else

the tower: which is about your surroundings, it’s the ‘vehicle’ that helps you shine

try: increasing the vibe of the place you are right now by decluttering, shifting/rearranging, making space for new; surrounding yourself with stuff that you love, taking care of your physical body

the beacon: which is about being seen & heard… being authentically, vulnerably, you

try: talking about how you feel, own it, say it out loud, speak up, write about it and share it with others (see i’m trying this one right now! lol.)

the inner light: which is about seeing yourself clearly, feeling lit up from with in

try: visualizing your future self (or the highest, brightest lighthouse version of you) who has come out of this on the other side – what would she want you to know?

the sky: which is about connecting to your soul, your source

try: meditation, reiki, prayer, surrender

(i’ve been doing the ‘untangle your cords’ meditation as a way of calling all the parts of my light back home, expanding that light within me, and allowing the ‘bigness’ of it to shine)

have you experienced something like soul lag in your life? how would you describe it? what are your strategies for adjusting to your ‘new place’? i would love to hear from you!

immense gratitude to denise litchfield and her lovely group the psychic playground for helping me to explore the idea of soul lag….  and to the incredible elevate self-leadership circle – these ladies are the best, most supportive people i know and together we’ve created an amazing place to do the work to rise up & shine our light… thank you for your love ladies.

would you like to learn more about the lighthouse framework, including concrete strategies for each component? grab the beautiful lighthouse keepers free digital magazine… it is both inspiring and practical!

shadow hunting

the darkness, the shadows, the storms…  i am curious about this part of the journey, because it’s the other side of the light.

in fact, it’s why i started talking about the ‘harbour’ of the lighthouse. i needed a place to acknowledge the darkness alongside the light. i needed to include a safe place where we could just BE in whatever it is we are experiencing.

so i am indeed curious to explore the darkness… i would like to be a shadow hunter peering into the darkness, shining a light on what needs to be seen.

i like the idea of firmly planting my two feet on the ground, facing the darkness head on, and proclaiming: “i’m going in!” – it creates a playfulness, a sense of curiosity and adventure, rather than seeing this as something hard, scary, or to be avoided at all costs!

and i don’t think being a shadow hunter is about being a shadow ‘fighter’ or shadow ‘conqueror’…. i don’t think that’s the point.

exploring the darkness doesn’t mean we are broken… it’s not about fixing it.

it’s about facing it.

knowing it.

owning it.

embracing it.

because perhaps in facing the darkness we will find our light.

in feeling our pain we will experience healing.

in knowing our fear we will discover courage.

in understanding our shame we will cultivate compassion… for ourselves.

in recognizing our biggest challenge we will uncover our greatest gift.

in seeing our demons we will be able to let them go… so they no longer hold the same power over us.

maybe, by owning the shadow side of ourselves – the stuff about us that we aren’t so good at, or proud of, or that we try to hide away – we will stop feeling less than because of it.

for no one is perfect. no one is all light, all the time. and placing that impossible expectation upon ourselves will always make us feel, in some way or another, like we are not enough.

maybe when we embrace our own shadows we will see that we are still worthy… worthy of love and joy and abundance and success and all of it.

maybe exploring our darkness is about deciding to just BE where we are, here and now, in our harbour. to stop avoiding, running, or hiding from the darkness… to stop pretending it isn’t there… but instead to set up camp inside of it, to decide: "this is it. this is a part of me. and i will build up from this place."

and so, HOW?

(this is how my brain works, it's not enough for me to say: 'oh yes, right, explore the darkness. that's nice.' my brain asks HOW?)

how do we explore our darkness? how do we confront our shadow self? how do we face our biggest storms, and come out the other side to shine our light?

that's what i am willing to try... to be a shadow hunter... to 'go on in' and see what i find.

what is self leadership?

  • what is self leadership? 
  • what has it got to do with building a lighthouse & being your own lighthouse keeper?
  • why does self leadership matter to the average person living their life?
  • how do you know you are ready for some self leadership, and how do you get started?

i am sharing my thoughts on self leadership, and why i believe the lighthouse is actually a beautiful framework to practice self leadership.

i would love to hear from you... what does the word "self-leadership" mean to you? what could it mean to you, if you had more of it in your life?

click here to watch the youtube video: https://youtu.be/1gMbLoTJX4Q
listen to the audio or read the transcript below.

self leadership.

 

my lighthouse keeper’s journey started at a time i was feeling lost, stuck, no mojo, no clear focus, not in the greatest place…not all that happy in my life… and i didn’t know what to do to change things.

i came across this quote by anne lammot:

“lighthouses don’t go running all over an island looking for boats to save; they just stand there shining.”

and i thought… yes that’s what i want! i want to be a lighthouse! and so i began a quest of sorts to ignite my light, ignite my spark, to feel ignited and excited again… and that led me to start the lighthouse revolution as i realized overtime that there is more to the story than feeling ignited!

which is where the framework of the lighthouse comes from, because there are 7 components and every component

so my journey has been about…

exploring what ignites me and lights me up

sharing that with others & being of service to others

building something that i love, a life that i love

working on my mindset

working on my resistance and my blocks, getting myself unstuck

making my way through the darkness and storms

feeling connected to something bigger than me

and eventually these things became the 7 components of the lighthouse.

more recently i’ve been intrigued and inspired by the idea of self-leadership, because the more i think about it the more i feel that is what the lighthouse is, it’s a framework for self-leadership.

i’ve been talking about this lighthouse stuff for nearly 5 years… and the journey isn’t over, i don’t think you ever stop building your lighthouse. but at least i have the framework now, the path, the map, the blueprints to help me do the work, and that’s why i am so passionate about sharing it, i want everyone to have the framework! i want everyone to be able to build themselves a lighthouse so they can shine their light in the world, so they can be their highest & brightest self.

so i’m excited because i think this idea of self-leadership is a great way to describe what the lighthouse revolution is all about.

to me the word self-leadership very simply means being a leader to yourself.

rising up, speaking up, taking action, making a change, shining your light… by yourself, for yourself.

maybe you want to…

do something.

create something.

change something.

start something new.

go after something.

try something different.

…no one is going to grab your hand and do it for you.

if you feel like there has got to be something more than this, or there is something missing, or you don’t want to stay stuck, lost, stagnant, no mojo

or maybe you’ve been in that place of procrastination, paralysis, perfection – where you want things for yourself byt you can’t seem to take action

maybe you keep saying one day when… you have more time, more energy, you are more ready… well when is that one day going to come?

no one is going to come along and take you on that path… be that person or that magic bullet that fixes things for you

here’s the thing… this is your choice.

you don’t have to take that path.

you can stay stuck, safe, same, small.

you can wait for more time, money, energy.

you can choose to keep complaining, keep whinging ‘poor me, my life sucks, i am a victim.’

you can keep dreaming, keep longing, keep wishing for things… setting intentions, resolutions, goals, dreams, plans…

you can keep doing that until you are ready.

it’s your choice.

or… if you are ready, you can start taking your own path, forging your own trail, leading yourself… asking ‘what will we do here? something has got to give. and that something is me. it’s on me.’

let’s be clear.

it is a choice. it’s your choice. own it.

if you are not ready to be your own leader, own it. out loud. say ‘maybe one day. but not today. i’m not ready.’

if you are ready? what do you do? how do you start taking steps to lead yourself out of the place you are, and into the place you want to be?

by the way, you know what i think is awesome about this whole self-leadership thing?

you actually do get to take your path. you get to do your thing. focus on your journey. beat the drums for your own thing. it doesn’t affect anyone else or take away from anyone else’s journey. it’s yours! you might walk alongside someone else on a self leadership journey but this is all about you, it’s yours, you get to do it your way.

i think self leadership is about looking inwards, taking responsibility, taking ownership… saying ‘this is on me. i am the only one who has the capacity to make a change here, the only one with the capacity to look at what i want and choose to take a step towards it.’ wright or wrong, pass or fail… to start taking our own hand and leading ourselves forward.

i think it’s about prioritising, putting ourselves first… saying ‘this matters. i matter. what i want matters. and so i have got to figure out how to do it.’

it’s about fulfilling your potential.

seeking your purpose.

finding your passion & feeling lit up again.

being the highest, brightest version of yourself.

owning it. and doing it without guilt. because if you don’t own it, why would anyone else support you, cheer for you, or even just try to understand it.

so if you are ready to do the self-leadership thing… to say ‘i’m going to rise up by myself, for myself. i’m going to take action. i’m going to do it for me.’… here are some ideas to get you started.

1. look back at the road so far.

know what brought you here to have a clear picture of where you are going… understanding the road so far can open your eyes to the road ahead. seek understanding, awareness, clues, and signposts.

2. have a vision.

what is your destination here? if you’re leading yourself down a path have a destination, know where you are going and why. your why is what fills your tank… it’s important to know what fuels you… what gives you energy, passion, purpose, and drive.

know yourself… learning yourself is, i believe, one of the biggest parts of this self-leadership journey… you need to know you. what are your strengths, what do you value, what’s your personality type? because everything else you choose, every step you take, has to align with that.

(this is the ‘ignite your light’ part of the lighthouse… it starts with you!)

3. own it!

say it out loud. if you can’t say it, own it, by speaking up, by being seen, by saying ‘hey this is me, this is what i am working on, this is what matters, to me, this is the path i’m on’… if you can’t say it, it can be very hard to do it!

(this is the beacon of the lighthouse… it represents us speaking up!)

4. how will you get there?

this is about making your plans, choosing your steps and your strategies. what will you focus on? what will you choose to include into your world to support and serve what it is you say you want. it’s about giving yourself permission… what to focus on, say no to, change, or declutter.

(this is the tower of the lighthouse… it’s the tall structure, the vehicle, that helps you shine!)

5. work on your mindset.

your confidence, worthiness, valuing yourself enough to do this, being brave, backing yourself! saying ‘this matters to me so i am going to fight for it.’ nobody else is going to back you if you don’t back yourself first. be brave enough, confident enough, worthy enough, believe you matter enough, to take action.

(this is the foundation of the lighthouse… you don’t want to build on a wobbly foundation. make it strong by building up your mindset.)

6. get unstuck.

it’s important we shine a light on the stuff that comes up and gets in the way on this journey – stuckness, resistance, blocks, fears, worries, doubts, guilt, limiting beliefs. it’s all part of the journey, in fact the stuff that comes up as you lead this path to what you want, the person you want to be, it comes up for a reason.

you are the leader here, the warrior on this quest, and as you fight those dragons, overcome those obstacles, you grow! you become the best version of yourself. so have a willingness to explore your stuff, be curious, have fun! let the journey be as amazing as the destination.

(this is the spiral staircase of the lighthouse… it reminds us of our journey, every little step we take takes us closer to the top.)

7. come back.

understand that the journey will have darkness, storms, and shadows. have a willingness to just BE in those places, and know that you can come back to your path, you can change directions, you can start again, you can come back to what you want, you can come back to yourself, you can keep going.

(this is the harbour of the lighthouse… it reminds us we can come back to our light at any time.)

it can also help if you surround yourself with an ocean of love… if you have support, if you feel safe, if you have a sense of belonging… it can help you on your self-leadership journey.

8. connection.

the last thing that i think is important (and i have only begun to explore this myself) is feeling connected to something bigger than you, to your source, your inner guidance system or inner light, (whatever you want to call it). think of it as spirituality or connection to your soul or to your purpose or to feeling like the universe has your back.

(this is the sky above the lighthouse… a connection to the source of your light)

i feel like this is important and a lot of times i think we discount it. in fact most of us do some of these things really well and others not so well… they are not natural to us or not in our wheelhouse.

the lighthouse framework reminds us that all of these bits are important! they all make a difference.

learn what you are naturally good at, use it to help you on your journey of self-leadership. also learn what doesn’t come naturally to you…

for example, if speaking up doesn’t come naturally you can learn to get better at it. or if you notice you don’t feel at all connected to your soul, you don’t have strong spiritual beliefs or practice, or whatever allows you to feel connection, you could start to build it now.

if you have all of the components… the whole lighthouse, the whole framework… you have everything you need for self-leadership.

so keep exploring this and exploring yourself!

we are each on our own journey… taking our own path, forging our own trail… that’s what self-leadership is all about! but we can do it together. we can support each other, we can walk alongside each other. when each of us chooses to rise up and shine our light we inspire others to do the same as well.

a rising tide lifts all ships. let’s keep rising.

rise up, by yourself, for yourself. because what you want for yourself is worth it. you are worth it.

 

behind the scenes of overcoming stuckness

i'm having a bit of a celebration this week... it's the lighthouse revolution book's first birthday! i can't actually believe it has already been a year since this little baby finally came to life! 

it took 7 months from the time i started writing until the day the book started arriving into the hands of readers... but of course it took longer than that to let the idea build and grow, and to overcome my own resistance, in order to finally, make this little dream happen!

do you have a BIG dream... something you want to do, create, explore... or bring to life in some other way? 

i want to share a bit about the behind the scenes of bringing that book to life... the real truth about getting unstuck, overcoming resistance, taking action, and why it matters so much to do just that... why achieving this type of dream is actually about so much more than the dream itself.

whether you want to write a book, or there is something else you want to focus on or create or even change in your life... it's worth it. i promise.

in this video i am taking you step by step through my biggest blocks; you might be familiar with these...

  • yah right. it's never gonna happen! 
  • nope, i'm not there yet... i need more (training, experience, etc.)
  • still not ready... i'm waiting for everything to be figured out
  • actually... it's all too hard, too overwhelming, too much work
  • it's not the right time, i will do it when...
  • what if it's not good, not perfect, not helpful?
  • what if i hate it? i suck at it? what if it's awful? 
  • i will do all of this work and no one will buy, no one will care, it's just gonna flop

watch or listen to my journey through these obstacles here...

and just know this: i promise you there is a way through every block... the steps, the plans, the work, it's all figureoutable.... and the time will never actually be quite right, you will never actually be fully ready... but you can decide to start anyways.

just imagine if you started today?

one year from now, what could you be celebrating?

please give yourself permission to shine, the world is waiting on you!


to celebrate the book's first birthday we are having a #bookbirthdaybash... you can grab the print book, ebook, or audio book at a great birthday price this week! i am also excited to announce that i am now offering the navigate guide book in print - yep a real life workbook that you can hold in your hands and scribble away in! i also have something brand new to share... a quick & fun online class to help you create your lighthouse blueprints for one of your specific goals, intentions, or plans!

all of these on for special birthday prices this week only... pop over to check them out!

purpose + flow

“ok, i’m doing it! i’m living my purpose, i am showing up and shining my light, i’m hearing the call and taking the leap… so why the hell is it all so hard? i thought that when you were in alignment with your purpose everything was meant to flow but i feel blocked at every turn... why don’t i have any flow? what am i doing wrong here?”

we had a discussion about this over in elevate last month, and i don't normally post 'video blogs' but i wanted to share my elevate 'QnA' video here with you just in case you’ve felt the same frustration.

i know i have!

it’s seems so unfair doesn’t it? don’t you want to just rant at the universe? like: dude. i’m here. i’m holding up my end of the bargain. why aren’t you?

and this question is the exact reason that we are never done building our lighthouse… this journey is really just a big long spiral! take action… explore resistance, clear blocks, build mindset, heal & grow & evolve & learn… get new clarity… take action again.

so my quick answer is there is nothing wrong with you... you are not broken... this is how the journey is supposed to go! and there is nothing wrong with your purpose either… you haven’t gotten it all wrong. i do think there are ways to create more flow... it just might require you to think about flow in a new way!

in this video (or audio) i share...

  • what i think purpose really is and why you haven’t gotten it wrong just because things feel hard, things are going wrong, or you seem blocked at every turn
  • how you can shift your perspective - from blocks being obstacles & barriers in your path, towards them being opportunities & signposts that point to your next steps.
  • how flow isn’t about the physical stuff working out - the plans, actions, strategies, people, tools, etc; rather flow comes from your perspective… it’s about what’s happening inside of you rather than what’s happening around you
  • how to create more flow by using the 7 components of the lighthouse as a guide – i've got quick, simple ideas you can try right away, or save for the next time you are feeling like you haven't got a lot of flow happening

music messages

how does your intuition work?

i believe that we are all intuitive… it’s not something you have or don’t have. it’s more about your awareness, your understanding, and your capacity to explore & play with it.

as with most things on this journey, i feel like my intuition has unfolded and awakened in layers. when i was younger i can certainly remember distinct moments where i felt like my intuition was telling me something, but i didn’t grow up thinking i was a particularly intuitive person.

though i was very interested in exploring topics of spirituality, purpose, the meaning of life, etc. i didn’t really have the language or awareness to understand or explore my own connection to my inner voice/inner guidance system… or my inner light as i like to think of it now.

it wasn’t until the last few years – as i began to connect with more and more women who are intuitive, psychic, spiritual, sensitive – that i began to explore this in a bigger way. in fact my own exploration of spirituality – as a connection to something bigger within us and around us – prompted me to include it as part of the lighthouse framework… because i truly do believe it makes a difference.

around the time i started to explore my own spiritual practice i began to notice something… music was beginning to have bigger and bigger meaning in my life.

my whole life i’ve been a collector of quotes and lyrics… i have journals from when i was 16 years old full of music lyrics and quotes that were meaningful to me. and as the lighthouse revolution began to unfold i had started collecting and sharing music that epitomized the message i was wanting tell.

and then one day i was driving along and a song came on the radio that made me think of my grandma who had recently passed. i thought that was a nice moment to think of grandma. and then the next song had the same theme, and that made me take notice. i wondered – is grandma here with me? is she trying to tell me something? the next 3 songs contained a clear and powerful message for me – about something that i was really struggling with at the time. i just knew – in every fibre of my being – that she was there, telling me something.

it’s a moment i will never forget.

after that, the music messages started happening more and more often. sometimes it would be super obvious, sometimes i would just get a feeling to pay attention to a song… sometimes it would be a message for me, sometimes i would get a message for a friend and would pass it on by sharing the song with them.

and then one day i happened upon the amazing denise litchfield and her quiz about psychic strengths… turns out i am a ‘seashell’, which is related to clairaudience. i have never 'heard voices' so i didn’t think that could be me, but one of the things that she shares is that you might hear messages though lyrics! that was a big moment of permission and confirmation for me.

so i started being more purposeful my efforts – practicing... learning... acting like a 'seashell' – and now music is a big part of my own connection practice, as well as part of my distance reiki illuminate sessions. it’s made a huge difference to me to recognize how my own intuition works and play in the space of exploring and developing it.

one of the things i hear most often from my illuminate clients is how unique the use of music is in my sessions - they always say how spot on it is and how powerful it is, and many of them have an aha where they realize that music is one way that their intuition can work as well!

i don’t know about you, but i am horrible at visualization… if i do a guided meditation i can’t see a thing and no matter how much i have different practices i never ever “see” anything – which always use to frustrate me! not anymore… because now i know that’s not how my inner light works.

i do sometimes feel things & know things… that has become more pronounced the more i practice 'hearing' things... noticing the words, songs, lyrics that pop into my head, or sometimes into my path… i will go on instagram and get the same message from 3 different posts and i know to pay attention!

if you do denise’s quiz and discover you are seashell, or you simply want to play in the space of music messages, here are some ideas you can try.

  • pay attention as you listen to the radio.

if a song catches your attention, listen closely to the lyrics and consider what message they have for you. (you might need to jot down the name of a song and listen again later… i keep a notebook in my car for this very reason) as you begin to “notice” when a song catches your attention, that nudge to pay attention, also notice what it feels like. how do you know you are getting a message and not just hearing a random song… it’s all about awareness and exploration… just notice and keep noticing! keep a journal of your music messages… the more you keep track and keep noticing the stronger your connection will get.

  • create your own playlist

start collecting songsthat are meaningful to you (spotify is great for this, and free) – songs that make you feel great, songs that match your intentions, songs that fit with your mission/message/passion/purpose, songs that remind you of the you that you long to be. the more you become intentional with your music – purposely picking out and playing songs that are meaningful to you – the more you build that intuitive connection to music. i think of it as saying ‘yes please! thank you! more like this!!’ to the universe. spotify also gives you a ‘discover weekly’ playlist, based on your tastes, and i find this a great place to explore and find new music to add to my playlist.

  • let music be your oracle deck

consider one of your own intentions – something you are wanting to focus on or shift or explore – and ask the music for a message. here’s how i do it – i write in my journal whatever it is i would like some insight on and then i open my spotify lighthouse playlist. (it’s full of powerful messages & you can borrow it for this exercise if you’d like!) i choose one song that feels like a good starting point – it might match my question/intention or it might just feel like a great song to help me connect. make sure the playlist is set to random and as you listen to the first song of your choosing, let that be the time you pray for guidance/meditate on your intention/ask for insight. as you listen you can let your own inner light expand outwards to ‘touch’ the music or you can let the music sink in to your soul, or whatever you like… it’s really about adding the music to your connection practice, however you like to do it. then notice the next 3 songs that come on… you might want to have a notebook handy to make note of any lyrics. the message might not come through the lyrics specifically… the message could be related to the title, it could be related to a memory that pops up, or to something the song reminds you of, or how it makes you feel. the key is to pay attention to what pops into your head as you listen. i like doing 3 songs in the row, because i think 3 songs paints a total picture more so that one song alone.

  • bring music into your own daily practice

if you are into chakra work, oracle decks, essential oils, yoga, dance, or any other practice… choose some music to complement it... enhance what you are already doing with music! you might like to try out some kundalini meditations – i learnt about these first from gabby bernstein and her book the universe has your back, and it’s made a massive difference to me. i find guided meditations frustrating because i can’t picture anything, and i am not great at silent meditations, or meditations with lovely instrumental music. but when i started singing along to the kundalini songs/mantras i noticed a huge shift in my practice, and in my energy. you can start with my meditation playlist on spotify if you’d like.  

  • notice when music shows up in your life

if you are scrolling through facebook or instagram and notice a song recommendation or someone shares lyrics to a song, go give it a listen. if you are watching a tv show or movie and a song catches your attention, jot down some of the lyrics so that you can find it online and listen to it later. music happens all of the time in my world, and lots of it i don’t even notice. but when i do notice it now, i try to actually give it my attention… to honour the fact that it popped out at me and give it my awareness. do this especially if you have a random song (or earworm as they are sometimes called) stuck in your head – go look up the lyrics or have a proper listen to the whole song - there may be a message in that song!

  • let yourself feel the music

for so long i tried to ‘tone’ down my sensitivity… to not show my emotions when i felt moved by a song (or anything else for that matter!). the more i work with music – particularly as i have been sharing the music messages that come up in my illuminate sessions – the more deeply i feel the energy of the message. it’s pretty common now for me to get choked up when i share a music message with someone in a session, or when i get a message myself. i had to pull my car over the other day because i got such a strong three-song message it made me cry! and when i went to a recent adele concert i cried through nearly the whole thing… it felt as though i could feel the vibrations of the music, and the amazing vibes of the audience, all the way to my core. i just let myself feel it… i never would have done that before, but the more i let the music be part of what makes me me the stronger that connection gets.

even if music isn’t really your thing i hope that these ideas will still give you permission to explore whatever is your thing. we sometimes think that ‘intuition’ or ‘connection’ has to look and work a certain way – maybe because of how it works for someone we admire, maybe because of what someone has taught us or told us – maybe because we think we don’t really have it!!

but from my own experience i would say that there are NO rules here. you get to do YOU, your way! have fun… play… explore… give yourself permission to see what happens when you pay attention and take notice of whatever message your intuition is sharing with you.


i have 5 illuminate sessions still available this week... with a bonus custom essential oil blend to help you anchor into your intention for the month ahead. illuminate is a powerful combination of intuitive insight + energetic clearing + guided exploration to help you find and clear the resistance that blocks your path. click here for the details.

act as if

crickets.

do you know the feeling?

you share something… and nothing.

no readers. no viewers. no comments. no followers. no engagement. no traction. no impact.

crickets.

it can be such a discouraging feeling, can’t it?

you might start getting a case of the why bothers. you might start questioning your words, your work. you might even feel like giving up.

i get it. i’ve been there too.

but remember this… this quote from anne lammont that inspired this whole revolution…

“lighthouses don’t go running all over an island looking for boats to save; they just stand there shining.”

that’s the whole point.

you have to be the lighthouse.

you have to act as if.

as if there are 1000 boats, or 100 boats, or even just one boat out there, lost at sea, needing your light.

close your eyes. picture that one person out there… that one reader. that one listener. that one viewer. that one customer. that one future friend. that one like-minded soul.

what do they need to hear today?

you are not alone.

it’s going to be ok.

you’ve got this.

speak to them. talk directly to that one person. act as if they are already out there... waiting, searching, listening… show up for them.

and show up again. and again.

this little trick works when you are trying to overcome your own fear to try something new: to do your first facebook live, or to record your first podcast or youtube video, to start a blog or write a book, to send a letter to your tribe or post something vulnerable on social media.

it can be hard to overcome our own resistance, that voice in our head saying “who am i to do this? what if people don’t like it? what if i get crickets?”

we need a reason to show up and shine… let that one boat out at sea be your reason. focus on them. talk to them. shine out your light to them. act as if they are already there waiting for you.

this helps too if you are writing an article for someone else’s blog or website, speaking to someone in a podcast or interview, attempting to be published in a magazine or a collaborative book, even speaking up in a group forum. it can be hard to know what to say… what will appeal to someone else’s audience. instead, just picture your one boat out there at sea. talk to them. write for them.

the keeper of the beacon is the rockstar. to build up your resilience and overcome your resistance you need to tap into your inner rockstar… rock star energy is about standing, authentically, on your own kind of stage, singing out the song of your soul.

what would that mean to you? it doesn’t have to mean actually standing on a stage! it could be more like standing out on a street corner like an indie rocker playing to the beat of your own drum. or maybe it’s hanging up your work in a gallery, or adding it to the shelves of a library, or standing at the front of a classroom, or showing off your stuff in the pages of a magazine.

start acting as if right now. let your blog, your video, your email, your facebook, your instagram be that stage… and share yourself as though your audience, your boats, are out there already waiting for you.

here’s the thing we forget sometimes.

everybody starts at zero.

every single person you admire for shining their light in the world started at zero.

but it’s the people who keep showing up, keep rising up, keep trying, keep tweaking… keep shining… that grow from zero.

it requires tenacity, perseverance, resilience…  you need to build those foundation blocks up in yourself, ignore the crickets, focus on your one boat out at sea… and act as if you are already the lighthouse.

failure

it's my birthday week! (my dad taught me to do that… to stretch your birthday fun out for a whole week… it really is the best!) and i’m looking back at the past year, as we often do on our birthday…

i think i am feeling particularly reflective this year because last year my birthday was so momentous.

last year on my birthday i launched the kickstarter for my book lighthouse revolution! the kickstarter ended up being a massive success… i nearly doubled my goal with $9198 raised and 150 print books ordered. then i launched the kindle ebook with 1536 books downloaded in the 5 day launch and made it to #1 best seller in all of my categories. i also recorded the audio book, created the companion navigate guidebook, and ran a live ‘book club’ to implement the the ideas in the book.

it was a big year for the lighthouse revolution, accomplishing a long time goal of writing, publishing, and launching a book, not to mention everything else i have created, shared, launched this past year.

it is so important to celebrate your successes, achievements, and wins. not only does it help to keep your light ignited and your vibes high… but it is also an important mindset strategy. celebrating success trains your brain to believe that you are worthy and deserving of success.

but what do you do about all the failures?

what do you do about that list of things that didn’t work out or go well or get anywhere… those dreams you started the year with that fizzled or flopped.

sometimes even all the success in the world can’t take away the pain of the one thing you failed at,  or fucked up.

here’s what i am learning to do to as a strategy to deal with failure...

give everything you do, try, share, offer, or explore more than one purpose.

there is always the obvious purpose… for instance if you’ve created an offer to sell you have the purpose of earning money. if you’ve created a free opt-in you have the purpose of building your list. if you’ve filmed a youtube video you have the purpose of people watching that video! you’re probably tracking your sales, your list size, your views.

but what i am learning about me is that if that is my only purpose… or even if that is my primary purpose… it is so easy to feel like you’ve failed if you don’t meet your goal.

i need to give my efforts a bigger purpose than the obvious one.

perhaps my offer has the purpose of reminding people about my zone of genius, what i can help them with or the difference i can make. perhaps i can test out my wording or my imagery to see if it resonates. perhaps i can practice making the offer so that it feels authentic and fun and aligned. perhaps i can push out of my comfort zone and make my offer in new places. perhaps i can give myself the space to be creative, to brainstorm, to try out new things that might become part of my biz model.

if i can give what i do a primary purpose like that then i will still have accomplished so much even if i don’t make the sale, or get views, or get subscribers, or whatever else is the obvious purpose.

one of my strengths is creating things and getting them out there. i have overcome my old perfectionist tendencies and i am pretty good now at overcoming my fear, which means that i’m good at taking action and taking the leap and just making shit happen.

but my challenge is that if the stuff i create/ share/ offer ‘flops’ (i get crickets, no one buys, no one cares) i feel like i’ve failed… it knocks me right down, and i can get into a discouraged place… this place of ‘nothing ever lands’ and ‘maybe i should just give up.’

i always manage to bounce back, thanks to all of the self-leadership tools i have in my back pocket. but i also recognize that this pattern needs to change… i don’t want to keep taking that downward spiral where all i can see is lack.

one way i am trying to shift that pattern it is to give my efforts a bigger purpose. something that can’t flop: something like learning or noticing or exploring or testing or practicing or stretching.

that way, no matter what happens, it’s still a win.

there is still something to celebrate.

don’t get me wrong. a failure still hurts. it’s hard not to meet your goal. i think back to that kickstarter and i’m so very grateful to the 140 backers who made it such a huge success... and i am really proud of myself too. but what if i had failed? what if i hadn’t met my goal? it would have hit me hard, i know it... i wouldn’t feel proud of myself for having given it a go, i would just feel like a failure.

that’s why i want to shift that pattern. i don't want 'rock bottom' to be my go to place!

and you know, i think it’s not even about having strategies to ‘deal with failure’... it’s about finding ways to make failure not even a thing any more.

to find the successes in every effort. and to let those successes… even the small ones… be the foundation blocks we keep building on instead of letting so-called failures become wrecking balls that knock us down.

so that's my new strategy - giving my efforts a bigger purpose than the obvious, so that failure doesn't exist. 

how about you? how do you turn your failures into wins? what purpose can you give your efforts so that failure won’t even exist?


join us in the elevate circle where our theme in april is to #keeprising. we’ll be learning actionable strategies (practical, mindset, and energetic) to build resilience and tenacity. we’ll look at how to deal with the common stumbling blocks that knock us down like failure, criticism, comparison, and more. elevate is truly my most favourite place in the online space to hang out – incredible members, helpful strategies, inspiring action-taking…. we are there together doing the inner work AND the outer work to take our business to new levels. i’ve got a special 10 month membership on offer right now, and a special 1:1 biz coaching + elevate package as well, pop over to have a look and let me know if you have any questions about elevate. i would so love to help you keep rising. xo

keep rising

it’s a bit embarrassing to admit this out loud but i was totally wrong about the start of the year. and apparently i keep getting it wrong.

back in january i was all about chilling and dreaming and just BE-ing and it was an awesome month… mentally, emotionally, financially....

i declared, as i always do, ‘feburary the new january’… because that’s always my official start to my new year. and i was so ready.

but then february kind of sucked. a few things i wanted to focus on didn’t happen. business was slow. i didn’t really accomplish what i wanted to.

ok. no problem. we’re just getting started, right? so then i declared ‘march the new january’ and hit the reset button.

fresh new intentions. refocused energy and commitment. ready to make it happen.

and then march started out even worse! 

i had some big life issues to face. one of my projects was a massive flop. i completely shelved another project because my confidence was at an all-time low.

i’ve spent the better part of this month with a huge baditude that i just can’t seem to shake.

i know you know the feeling, because we've all been there... disappointed, dejected, disillusioned... beating yourself up, wondering if you should just give up.

it's not the best place to be. i'm so ready to leave this place.

i asked in a mastermind group that i am part of “can i make ‘april the new january’ or is that just asking too much?” i mean how many restarts do we get?

i got this great reply about how the astrological new year is march 20th... with the equinox. i liked hearing that! i feel like i have a great reason to start fresh with a new mindset and energy and focus this week. 

(i'm going to do our illuminate message today with this intention in mind - so stay tuned for that to get sent to your inbox or look for it here!)

but the truth is we get as many ‘restarts’ as we need. in fact, we get 365 of them a year... one every single day. we can decide… today is the day i start fresh.

today is the day i make a change.

today is the day.

but how?

that’s my focus now. how shift the energy? how do you deal with the shit that knocks you down? and how do you get back up again when you’ve been knocked down?

(ok, now i have that chumbawumba song ‘tubthumpin’ playing in my head… “i get knocked down. but i get up again. you are never gonna keep me down. i get knocked down. but i get up again.” not sure what it says about me that an old school, pub night, drinking song is inspiring me today... but it's a pretty good message, right?)

so how do you get back up again?

resilience? persistence? tenacity? fortitude? perseverance? strength? courage? 

grit.

(i like that word. it kind of says it all! it makes me feel like a fighter. it makes me feel like i can tap into my inner warrior and rise from the ashes.)

whatever you want to call it… we need to build it right into our foundation.

because the truth is, we all will fall. it’s part of the journey. getting back up again. and again. and again… is part of the journey.

at my kids’ school they teach students these ‘keys’ which include resilience, persistence, and confidence. i do find it slightly ironic that my 5 year old is telling me i need to ‘bounce back’ when i’m having a bad day!

but if the 5 year old can learn these tools, so can i damn it!

i intend to shift things this week. to have that fresh start. to indeed make ‘april the new january. and to begin again, and to carry on as i mean to go on.

and i intend to practice some actionable strategies to keep rising.

i would rather not ever spend another two months spiraling downwards. i would rather get better at bouncing back just a little more quickly, more effectively… get back up again, and keep going.

i would rather #bealighthouse than a crumbling old mess of 'giving up now.'

and so it is. i will keep rising. i must! afterall, i’ve got work to do in the world. there isn’t really any other option.

has your year been off to a rocky start? what is your best strategy for bouncing back or not giving up? what is the thing that most often knocks you down? do reply - i would so love to hear from you!


join us in the elevate circle where our theme in april is to #keeprising. we’ll be learning actionable strategies (practical, mindset, and energetic) to build resilience and tenacity. we’ll look at how to deal with the common stumbling blocks that knock us down like failure, criticism, comparison, and more. elevate is truly my most favourite place in the online space to hang out – incredible members, helpful strategies, inspiring action-taking…. we are there together doing the inner work AND the outer work to take our business to new levels. i’ve got a special 10 month membership on offer right now, and a special 1:1 biz coaching + elevate package as well, pop over to have a look and let me know if you have any questions about elevate. i would so love to help you keep rising. xo

be intentional

since starting my first biz i’ve always had a weird relationship with the word goals. and the word plans, for that matter. the thought of doing a business plan used to make my skin itch… i would picture this super boring, tedious document full of things that i couldn’t really answer, and didn’t actually care about, which just made me feel like a failure before i even begun.

eventually i realized i needed to create my plans my way and i embraced planning… though since i started the lighthouse revolution i prefer to call my plans ‘blueprints’ - they show me what i need to build in order to shine my light.

words have power: i believe that you need to choose the words and write the definitions that you align with, otherwise they do more harm than good!

goals is another one of those words that gives me hives. not that i don’t think it’s good to have goals – i do – i just see that word and i think of setting SMART goals (measurable, timelines, etc.) and immediately this sense of pressure weighs down on me, which automatically makes me start to prepare for failure.

the word that works for me right now is intentions.

i feel like this word is more expansive and also more inclusive: it could represent your goals, your plans, your resolutions, your dreams… the ideas you want to explore, the things you want to change, whatever you are wanting to focus on or develop… however you want to feel!

an intention can be for any part of your life, your work or biz, your home or self. it can be something big, something you have been wanting for yourself for a long time and you are finally ready to focus on it now, or it could be something small… something you just want to keep in mind for today.

an intention could be SMART if you want it to be – you could be very specific and set a time-line and track your progress – or it could simply represent something that you can quite put into words yet but you can definitely tap into what it would feel like, and focus on that.

and an intention is something that you set for your whole year, or for the month or week ahead, or for one day at a time, or for a single project you are working on, or for a strategy you are trying out, or for one of your offers you are making… for anything you’d like really!

it feels right to me, so it’s the word i use. but my whole point is: choose the words (and write the definitions) that work for you. it really does make a difference… words are powerful so choose wisely!

here are some things i am playing with to be more powerful with my intentions.

  • test out the wording to find what works best for you:

word your intention in the present tense, as though it is happening now ( i am, i have, i feel)

word it in the future, as though it has come true (it is Jan 1st 2018 and i…)

word it as a statement of gratitude, as though it has happened (thank you for/i am so thankful for)

  • anchor into your intentions:

write them down each day, write them over and over again

speak them out loud instead of just writing them down

choose an anchor - a physical represent your intention - and hang on to it!

  • be clear... as clear as you can be

what do you want? where are you going? who are you being? how do you want to feel? how do you want to spend your time? what really matters? and WHY?

  • create the blueprints or the map (or the plans!) for making your intention happen:

what steps do you need to take? what strategies do you need to use?

where is the resistance/the obstacles in your path? and how will you clear it?

what do you need to ignite or build up in you to make it happen?

  • find your circle:

share your intention with those who will stand with you in holding that intention, who will hold you accountable to be the woman you need to be for that intention to happen

show up for each other and in front of each other… both offering support and receiving it, holding the space for each other even as you take your own journey… because a rising tide lifts all ships

even with support, the bottom line is that no one can make your intentions happen but you. you must lead yourself, you must rise up by yourself, for yourself.

  • consider all of the components:

the lighthouse reminds me not to only focus on what comes easy to me, or what seems the most important thing right now, but that all of the components matter, and that all strategies (practical, emotional, mindset, energetic, etc.) are worth considering.

my intention for 2017 is to be/feel/act #unstoppable

my intention for the next round of lighthouse live is to have an #impact – supporting others, holding the space, teaching strategies, and offering a powerful framework to make their intentions happen… because incredible things happen when we each shine our light in the world!

my intention for this bog post is to share my own journey in the hope that it might be helpful to someone else… because while i haven’t figured it all out yet, i am willing to keep learning, keep exploring, and keep striving to #bethelighthouse

what intentions do you hold for yourself? how will you anchor into them? what will you do to make them happen? what is getting in your way?


our next round of lighthouse live starts on march 20th – join us with one of your big intentions in mind… we’ll work together over 10 days to create the blueprints and clear the obstacles so you can make it happen.

untangling energetic cords

people come into our lives for a reason. we experience the situations we experience for a reason. they offer us an opportunity to learn. they offer us a mirror… a way to look at ourselves and see what it is we are meant to heal, explore, or shift.

but what do you do when you’ve done the learning, you’ve explored your stuff, you’ve reframed the situation… and you still can’t seem to move on?

if you find yourself endlessly thinking about, remembering, obsessing over, being triggered by, or blaming someone else… or something else… then it’s time to cut the cords.

if you can’t seem to break an old pattern, change an old story, or start fresh with a new way of doing things… then it’s time to cut the cords.

no matter what kind of relationship we have with people or with the situations we face we form energetic bonds with them – and the more energy being sent between, the stronger those bonds form. (it’s a great lesson for us moving forwards to NOT obsess… all you do is strengthen the cord!)

so even if you have learned from it and you are ready to move on… maybe you’ve done some mindset work to reframe the situation into something more positive… maybe you have made some practical decisions to create some distance or change your re-actions… that energetic cord can make it feel like it’s still pulling you back in.

this is where it is useful to have some sort of cord cutting exercise or visualization in your toolkit… try out some different ideas to find one that feels right to you, or create your own! a google search on ‘cord cutting’ will give you all sorts of ideas… for instance you can ask archangel micheal to help you cut the cord with his sword.

i actually do a visualization that is more of an untangling than a cutting.

i like to picture myself standing tall like a lighthouse, beaming my light outwards. and i picture the other person/situation also as a lighthouse, off in the distance, doing the same… and all of our beams of light are entangled and twisted and knotted like strings of rope. i visualize pulling my beams of light back into my own lighthouse… as i breath in i suck my beams of light back into me, and as i breath out i blow their beams of light back to them.

you can listen to the short visualization below for the full process that i do – and please take the ideas that work for you, make it your own!

i like this visualization because it acknowledges that everyone has a right to be their own person, their own lighthouse, and you can’t actually change them… you can only change you. change your energy to disentangle from theirs.

it also acknowledges that the stuff that’s come up… the situations/words/behaviours/actions etc. that have triggered you in some way… have all happened for a reason. you were meant to learn, to grow, to evolve… and now that you have you can send that stuff back to whomever brought you the lesson.

i do this ‘cord untangling’ as part of my daily meditation practice, but it is a great visualization to do before you fall asleep or in any moment of your day if you feel sensitive to someone else’s energy or triggered by someone or something.

take the learning, leave the energy behind.

what strategies do you have for breaking energetic ties? it is a great idea to fill your toolbox with a variety of physical, emotional, mindset, and energetic strategies for the things you encounter on this lighthouse keeper’s journey.

your one big challenge

i have this theory.

i think that we each have one big thing to deal with in our lifetime… the big challenge we must face, the big question we have to answer, the big obstacle we have to overcome, the big lesson we are here to learn, the big story we have to write a new ending to… that one big thing that shows up again and again in our lifetime for us to work through.

i am pretty sure that my one big thing is about worthiness, because the story that seems to come up again and again is “i’m not enough” “this is not enough” “so it’s never going to land” – and just when i think i have cleared that block or changed that story, it sneaks back in again!

that’s the beauty of knowing your big challenge. by acknowledging it, we can more easily recognize it when it comes up again and again… and with that awareness, this big thing loses some of it’s power over us, some of it’s heavy weight.

it becomes just that thing we are here to do in this life time.

oh hey there BIG, persistent, thing… i see that you’re back again. ok then, let’s do this. i’m ready for ya, this time.

how can you figure out what your one big challenge is?

here are some clues…

that poor me/victim place that you go to when things get hard: why does this always happen to me? why doesn’t anybody ever…? when is it going to change? it’s so unfair! wahhhhh.

that situation that seems to trigger you every time, no matter how much you try to move past it: omg, i cannot believe that he said that… he did that…he made me feel like…!!!

that excuse you come up with to stay where you are: i want to, but… i would, except… i tried, but… that’s great for you, but my situation is special.

the pattern that you seem to play out over and over again: this happens, and then i do this, and then that happens, and then i feel like…

if you have a think about these clues and what they point to in your life, it might seem like you have more than one big thing (of course we face more than one challenge in our lifetime!) but if you start to dig a little deeper, explore a little further, and get to the core of those things you might find that in the end they all are pieces of the same puzzle… the same big thing.

and it might be really hard to figure this out about yourself at first. when we are deep in the trenches of our stuff we don’t always see the big picture created by all those little puzzle pieces.

but you can practice by becoming more aware of the people in your life… see if you can figure out what their one big challenge is. (it’s way easier to recognize this in other people because we aren’t so close to it, plus we are more naturally able to help others rather than help ourselves.)

you might notice that someone you love always seems to say: no one ever listens to me anyways, no one ever seems to care what i have to say about it. their big challenge might be around finding their voice or being visible. someone else in your life might seem to always find themselves in a pattern of people pleasing… maybe their one big thing to learn here is how to stand in their own truth, creating boundaries, or putting themselves first.

it’s actually very helpful to recognize the big challenge for the people in your life – not that you have to tell them what you think they need to do or help them to navigate it – but rather, it helps to see that we each are on our own journey. and to recognize that sometimes their stuff is indeed just their stuff - the stuff they are here to learn - and it’s not about you. it helps us to have compassion for others... even if we don’t want to be in the trenches with them and their stuff we can still let them go from a place of compassion.

plus, the more you can catch those clues in the people around you, the more you can start to catch them for yourself too.

once your own one big challenge makes itself clear to you, what do you do?

as i said, i think awareness is the key… with it, the energy around that big thing will begin to change. you will see yourself and your challenges a bit differently, plus you will be more willing to tackle this stuff head on when you know it’s what you are here to do… you will approach your challenges in a new way.

try to reframe that big challenge or big question or big obstacle in a new way.

so instead of always saying: when will i be good enough? when will this be good enough? when will it land?

i try to catch myself now and reframe those questions into the very thing that i am here to learn… i am enough just as i am. it is enough, it is landing… i see evidence of that all of the time.

i also believe that our biggest challenge... our deepest wound, our most persistent obstacle... is actually our greatest gift. it is when the tide is at its lowest that we can find the treasures in the sand. and it is through our darkness that we find our light.

i started the lighthouse revolution, not because i had magically discovered what i was here to teach in this lifetime, but rather because it was what i needed to learn myself. the lighthouse is what i needed in my own life & work to navigate my way through the darkness… i built exactly what would help me to clear my fog and shine my light. my effort to face my darkness head on has become the gift that i am here to share with others.

and so, facing your one big thing is indeed what you are here to do in this lifetime… why not face it head on? why not tap into your inner free spirit, your inner playful explorer/adventurer, and face it head on with a sense of wonder, of curiosity… ready to spiral with your stuff… to learn & grow… knowing that with each little step you take you are one step closer to your light.

what is your one big challenge for this lifetime?

#bethelighthouse and face it head on… it is only by shining your light on it that the darkness recedes and the gift is discovered.